FRIENDS

Dang, it is that time in the evening again. Time flies. I guess I shouldn’t complain. It seems I’m busy with things to do and places to go to. Tomorrow is Chinese New Year. I wouldn’t have known that if an email friend haven’t sent a greeting. I thought it would be in February. It’s good to have friends who keep you in the know.

I don’t really have a lot of friends. I can count them on one hand. What a thing to admit to, eh? It’s not a bad thing though I DO feel deficient at different times. I can’t handle too many people in my life. I  I’m an introvert, and highly sensitive. I have all the signs. So it is a good thing that I don’t have a whole bunch of people in my life. I would be so stressed and I would piss off many of them. There’s a silver lining under every cloud.

Don’t get me wrong. I am social. I love and need my friends. I just don’t need as/so many as other people. I could have more than I realize. I was surprised hearing that loneliness is such a problem in the UK that they have a minister of loneliness. This man in the UK had spent the last 20 years alone. After the story broke, people responded with a tree, gifts, visits and calls. Christmas is just one day. What about the rest of the year? How do we fix that?

I shouldn’t really be surprised about the loneliness problem. We live such insular lives. Most of us here drive everywhere in our private vehicles. Often we are the only one in the car. I didn’t realize how cut off that made me feel from other people until I had to take the bus because of parking problems. Now I take it once a week to my class on campus. I feel richer for the people contact. I’m in the midst of the young and not so young.

Add to that, I’ve restarted taking Sheba to the off-leash dog parks. We frequented them during our younger years. We’ve been doing mostly just the neighbourhood beat the last 6 or 7 years. We had a group of ‘friends’ at the parks. It was nice to walk and talk together. Some we know, some we knew just first names and some we just knew by faces. Still we felt sort of like family – at the dog park. That group have disappeared but we are now getting to know a different group by going at the same time each day.

Though I have only a very few close friends, all the people that touch my day and life enrich me and help give me a sense of meaning and purpose. I have little groups of ‘family’ and ‘friends’ in different corners – the YWCA, ex-workplace colleagues, Facebook, Instagram, blogoshpere, my email group….It’s good to have friends.

It’s late. I have to say good night. I have to swim in the morning. Here’s a video about an afternoon with my friends to take us out of this 24 day of the Ultimate Blog Challenge.

 

About hafong

Hello! My name is (Leung) Hafong alias Lily Leung. You always say the last name first….that is the Chinese way. That is my partner lurking behind me. Since this is my blog, I won’t mention his name. But this is a rather cool picture. You see me and yet you don’t…sort of the way I feel about myself most of my life. So this blog is a self-exploration, an archeology dig of some sort. My tools…..words of a thousand or so at a sitting. I will try for that.
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6 Responses to FRIENDS

  1. The way I understand it, introverts generally feel drained after being around people, while extroverts tend to become more energized from human interaction. Most people fall somewhere between these two extremes. I’m on the introvert side, which is why I happily engage with a lot of people online every day, but I rarely do it face-to-face. The Internet has been a lifesaver for people like me!

    • hafong says:

      I agree. The Internet can be a lifesaver. I enjoy engaging with small groups both in person and online. Too much overwhelms and drains me. Different strokes for different folks. It helps to know oneself.

  2. Inger says:

    I am an introvert. One true friend who goes out for lunch with me. Others forfeit about me. But I try to tell myself that is ok. Then I have friends who I visit with on the internet. Too far away to go to lunch with.

    • hafong says:

      You are blessed to have a true friend. I wonder how many people can say that. Your comment begs 2 questions. 1) Are you happy with your lot? 2) If not, what are you willing to do about it? I have had lunch with friends I met on the internet though not in recent years. I met them for meals in Halifax, Japan and Hong Kong.

  3. Chef William says:

    I am an introvert because I actually get wiped out when I spend time with people at parties. Even family can tire me out in a very short time. I can spend endless hours with my wife but that is about it.I have a few friends on the internet and I do keep in contact with my two sisters via Facebook however human face to face contact is kept to a minimum by me. I really enjoy the sound of silence. My dogs are a different story. We have 16 rescues and there is so much joy and happiness when I am with them. It does sound like you have just the right amount of friends and aquaintances to fill your social needs, and that is what it is all about isn’t it?

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