I’ve been absent for a few days, taking time off for living. My keyboards sit silent, waiting. This business of breathing in and out correctly and rhythmically takes time, care and energy. You cannot press the ENTER button and business is taken care of. No, you cannot but you can try.
I did try. I thought if I followed the formula, the rules and put the round and square pegs in their respective holes, everything would be hunky-dory. Not so, my lads and lasses! There was this thing called unpredictability that reared its unwanted head at me. My Leggo life crumbled in piles before me. I had to stand back, take stock and restart.
I did not lose all. I did not run back to the starting line. I restarted where I left off. Yup, I did learn a thing or two. No backtracking for me. I leave that to the scouts and hounds. I have no time for regrets over wrong roads taken. I can only go forward down the next best road.
Standing back, I see that I did the best I could at the time. I see that it was not for me to fix everything. I am not all that powerful. I am so glad for that. It’s a terrible burden to feel responsible for everything and everyone. And what ego! Really, I have to give myself a shake or two.
Not all idle time is a waste. It’s good to stop my tap, tapping so that I can hear what my heart was trying to tell me. Stop your bitching, complaining and blaming! Take responsibility! Live your life! I hear you, dear heart. Thank you.