TRUE CONFESSIONS

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I have to confess that I am having a difficult time with everything lately.  Perhaps it is because I am right on the cusp of RETIREMENT.  My life is going to change.  The word CHANGE is enough to scare the beejees out of anyone.  Maybe I need to change the way I talk to myself….the things I tell myself, the words I use.

Then, there is the weather.  I am sure that I can feel every drop in the atmospheric pressure.  I feel every shadow of each cloud as they pass over the sun.  It is no fun to feel your heart in your mouth.  I think I would prefer my foot.  Well, I can still joke.  That is something.

So this guy suggest that I surround myself with white light.  Then I could enjoy whatever energy is around.  That is a lovely thought…to enjoy whatever there is.  It is what I try to do when I embrace heavenly chi.  I hold this protective shield around me.  Seeing it in my mind’s eye makes me feel better already.  Letting the words fall from my fingers eases the fear.  Sometimes I drop out and nap like Sheba if I can. Escapism is not a bad thing.

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Vulnerability is not a bad thing either.  How else can God know what you need if you don’t tell?  I know he is all knowing and all that, but he is a busy fellow.  He has a large flock.  Sometimes all he needs is a whisper.  Other times you have to scream.  OVER HERE, GOD!

Screaming definitely makes me feel better, even if it is only in print.  It releases my stagnant chi.  My chest is relaxed and I can breathe.  Maybe now I can find that notice to renew my license plate.  It is due tomorrow.  I will find it.  I am not behind.  I have time.  Sit, stay and dine.  Everything is copacetic.

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About hafong

Hello! My name is (Leung) Hafong alias Lily Leung. You always say the last name first….that is the Chinese way. That is my partner lurking behind me. Since this is my blog, I won’t mention his name. But this is a rather cool picture. You see me and yet you don’t…sort of the way I feel about myself most of my life. So this blog is a self-exploration, an archeology dig of some sort. My tools…..words of a thousand or so at a sitting. I will try for that.
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One Response to TRUE CONFESSIONS

  1. drybredquips says:

    Glad you liked “spilled onions.” Thanks. Hope you like retirement. Took me a minute and 30 seconds to get used to it. Never looked back. I enjoy the controlled temperature inside a shopping center year-round, no matter the outside weather People, noise, conversation, reading, writing there, keep me from sleeping all the time in a chair at home. Best to you.

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